I am excited for June. June is the month of exciting times. My sister and nephew are coming in June for a visit, I have my doctor's visit on the 16th, and we are moving into our house. Those are the high points of June. I have so much faith that June will be a good month and we will enjoy ourselves and everything will be good. Life won't be as hard in June. I know that this is not true at all and June could turn into a crappy month but for now I have placed June way up there on cloud 3. Not cloud 9 because that is a little too happy. That cloud is reserved for when I get my take home baby. And I will get my take home baby.
I know that I shouldn't be looking forward to June so much. I will probably feel let down when things don't go quite as well as planned. My doctor's appointment may reveal nothing. He may tell me that there is nothing to be done until after three losses and just try again. He may not want to refer me to a specialist. He may just send me on my way. I'm trying to remain optimistic and think that he will help in some way. Even if all he has to do is fill out a referral and I will go somewhere else, I am hoping some good will come from this appointment. It's in less than a month now. I feel like it's been a long time coming. I just want to be told that all the tests and things can be done quickly and we can get results quickly and we can try again. I am sick of waiting. Although really, we would still be waiting no matter what. It hasn't been the recommended three cycles since my D&C yet. But the fact that we most likely still have another three months to wait is a little disheartening sometimes. But that's okay. In those three months we get to move into our very first house! I can't wait.