Friday, April 6, 2012

This, the eve of my 23rd birthday

Tomorrow is my birthday and I will be turning 23. Sometimes I feel like I'm so young and then other times I feel like I'm so old. Okay, not old but that I've had a lot happen in my life and a lot of hardships and heartache for being so young. Which is also kind of dumb because no one said young people can't go through hard times. Maybe in my head I figured I would at least be guaranteed good health for a couple more years yet. I'm young, why aren't I healthy? Blah. And I've lost 3 babies before turning 23. Well to be more specific, they died before I was even 22. Sometimes I look around at other people my age and wonder why they have it easier than me. But then I remind myself that I don't know everything, I don't see what goes on behind closed doors or in their lives. For all I know, they could just be putting on a really good front. The grass always looks greener on the other side. I need to stop comparing my life to others.

So, back to my birthday. Nothing is really planned (at least not that I know of) since it's hard to do anything when I'm sick. But I have high hopes for this next year. 23 has got to be better than 22 right? There were some good things about this past year but there was also a lot of bad things. I feel like it was a bit of a wasted year, like we didn't do much and time just stood still. We put off a lot of things in hopes that I would get better. And yet, I'm still sick. Oops, I'm getting sidetracked again. I'm going to make a list of positive things from this past year and then a list of things I'm hoping to do in this next year. Here goes!

Good things that happened when I was 22:
- We bought a house
- Dan planned me a surprise party and we went to Toronto for a concert
- We got Mia
- We moved to our wonderful new house
- We hosted family and friends over the summer
- We had campfires and a big backyard with no crazy neighbours
- I completed more of my courses towards my certificate
- Dan worked for most of it
- I made my own Christmas gifts
- I got bangs
- We started our own business

Things to look forward to:
- Succeeding in our new business venture
- Working on decorating the guest room and guest bathroom
- Camping this summer
- Having more friends over
- Hopefully getting better
- Planting a garden
- Maybe getting pregnant?

There. That's all I can think of tonight. I'll be back tomorrow to show off my new presents and share a picture of me looking all old and 23!

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